Talents I Wish I Had

I'm very fortunate for the talents I have, but there are many things I wish I was good at. Some of them I could probably find the skill improved with learning, hard work, and determination, but we'll put determination on the list of talents I wish I had.

• Singing - I do okay, but I wish I had a super unique and amazing voice, and the ability to rock melodies and harmonies 
• Playing a musical instrument - Once upon a time, I learned the clarinet for two years, but I gave it up. I wish I could play the piano, the guitar, the bass, and the ukulele. Maybe the drums. 
• Art - I wish I could draw and paint. I know it drives artists nuts when people say they were just born with the ability because it actually takes a lot of hard work to develop skill, but still, to some it seems to come easier than others. I make one good stick figure, though
• Acting - Sometimes I fantasize about being in movies, not for the fame but just for the fun of being a part of something like that. I was in a play once in 7th grade and did pretty good for a kid, but beyond that I'm not even sure how well I'd do. I admire people who can completely throw themselves into a role

I even wish I was better at writing, but with that I'm doing it as much as possible (or at least I'm setting a goal to work at it more). Everyone has strengths, everyone weaknesses, and that's what makes the world such an interesting place.

A List of Positive Things

The world can be such a dark place, and the road can be difficult. I want to write a list of positive things.

• Leaves changing color in the autumn
• Hot chocolate
• Blankets
• Pumpkin spice
• Books
• Composition notebooks
• The smell of ink from my pens
• An unexpected present
• Getting packages in the mail
• Hanging out with a friend
• Waking up early on my day off and realizing I can sleep longer
• Cold mornings I have nowhere to be and can stay warm and cozy in bed
• Babies giggling
• Good hair days
• Random compliments
• NaNoWriMo
• My writing group
• The Lord of the Rings extended movies marathon
• Dates with my mom
• Conversations with my brothers
• Sitting in the car with my dad on an ice cream run
• Chinese food
• Corn mazes
• My nephew telling me he loves me
• Dance parties when I'm home alone
• Finding new music
• Stretching sore muscles
• Taking pictures
• Finishing writing a novel
• Wind
• Thunderstorms
• Gray and yellow
• Fandoms
• Making someone laugh

Election 2016

I've never been more terrified of candidates for the President of the United States. From the Republican party, we have Donald Trump, who is one of the worst choices I've ever seen and I can't understand how he managed to be the Republican candidate to this day. He's vile, he's insulting, he's loud (and he'll say whatever to get his supporters pumped up even if he doesn't understand it himself). Trump is not a good man. From the Democratic party, we have Hillary Clinton, and I don't care that she's a woman and it would be a great moment in history for women to have one elected as President, because she is a traitor and has blood on her hands. She should be in prison, not running for our nation's leader. Honestly, I think this whole thing's a ploy, because the only way Clinton would have a chance of winning is if her opponent is literally the worst possible choice, and look here, we just happen to have such an opponent. 

I do not feel good about this race. Even if my voice is not heard by the vote I do cast, I will vote as I see best, as my conscience tells me. We have a fool and a criminal. There's very little patriotism left. There is violence and hatred. There is a huge divide in the country.

I hate talking politics, truly I do. Part of the reason is I don't feel as knowledgeable as I should be, so I don't want to just spit off incorrect information and argue points that really don't exist. The other reason is I do respect other people's rights to choose, and I know their opinions will not always match mine. I never want to make someone feel like they're stupid, or being fooled, or that they're lesser than me. But it is impossible to avoid talking about this race, as it's going to have such a massive impact on our country, as well as the rest of the world. 

We the people should have risen together and demanded worthy candidates. But we the people are no longer a people united. We're two different sides, yelling louder and louder trying to be heard. Everything is going to fall apart. 

Updates

I am closer to publishing my second novel, and I'm very excited and nervous. It has had positive feedback from my beta readers, and though I still have things I want to work on, I'm pretty proud of it. More details as the publishing date draws closer (though no date is set in stone).

On that note, I'd just like to say how grateful I am for the people in my life willing to read my work. Some mainly respond to how they enjoyed the story as a whole, others give it a thorough look-through to catch typos and grammar mistakes, but I need both to help motivate me. Without the support from family and friends (most of which are fellow writers), I don't think I'd get as far as I am.

Today I said goodbye to my other blogging site, tumblr. I could make a list to explain my decision to write a last post there, but in the end, I have spent much time on it and I'm ready to devote my time elsewhere. I've had fun on it, but there was also a negative feeling every time I logged on (not directed at me, but there was definitely a lot of negativity on the site). I want to focus on my writing, my reading, and blogging here as I get more personal when I type up text posts. 

These past few months, I've spent time with my family and friends, as I enjoy doing, and I'm also starting to reconnect at church, getting myself to go more often. I've enjoyed the couple of Sundays I went to the single's ward. (Still not dating, though lately I've wondered if I need to start working on me, deciding what I want, before I pursue relationships). There are a lot of questions I have, anxieties I feel, doubts that live inside me, and I want to know what would make me happy. That's my quest: happiness.

(Yes, I know happiness is a journey, not a destination, but who doesn't say they want to find what makes them happy?)

Oh, and I have a kitten now. His name is Simba. 

My brother, Braden, got him for his son, Kason, but they weren't able to keep him. Kason loves The Lion King and named him Simba, so I kept the name. 

Simba's a little bit of a devil. He likes to bring in grasshoppers to practice hunting, but his other favorite pastime is lying under my foot so I could rub his back while he paws at the carpet and sucks on it like he's nursing. I love him, even when he drives me crazy.

Life has been good. I'm going to Yellowstone with my friends this weekend, and NaNoWriMo will be here in November; I need to pick an idea and plan it out. My birthday's also coming up, and I'll be 24. I can't believe that!

To happiness. To finding it and choosing it.